Talking via Kris

Friday dawned wet and dark. Sigh. But no matter how bad it looks and how much I dread going out into the wet, I always love the walk and am glad to have done it when I get home. I feel like a good dad when Sheba has had a good long walk. When we were done, we went into the village for a quick shop of stuff before hurrying home to be there when Kris arrived to help me with the phone call to Dr. Hull.

Back home, I cleaned a bit and tidied before Kris arrived, but I’ve been keeping the house clean and tidy. It makes me feel good to live in an orderly place. I used to clean up for guests, and then I thought one day long, long ago: Wait a minute, why do I honour my guests but not myself, and ever since I keep the house as clean as I can.

Kris came just before noon and thank God she did because without her the call would have been a disaster. She handled the entire call, and it went well in that Dr. Hull is going to have his assistant research Doxy.me, the medical video chat program, so that in the future he can speak with me on video.

After the call, I’d picked up a delicious potato salad from Ground Up, our local healthy eating diner, and I had some pastries for dessert, so we sat down for a quick lunch before she had to return to her hubby Steve and an afternoon of baking.

The afternoon was spent just chillin’ because I’d had a seizure right before Dr. Hull called. And the evening was the usual: dinner and a movie. I ate a lot yesterday, partly because my weight is getting close to too low, and partly because I’d had a guess for lunch and in the evening, I was eating for fun, not out of need. Today will be different. I’m going to be a good boy.

Chris Makes a Font

I’m not a fan of pop music, but I watch Tik Tok videos and sometimes someone appears on my feed that makes me melt. I love this guy, B.J. Griffin. He radiates joy and what a wonderful voice!

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I had to walk Her Highness is semi-darkness so that I could get her back to the house and then get to the dentist on time. What a way to begin the day, with fillings. I got little fillings where my gums had receded, and then I came home to bake on what had become a gloomy day after an early morning clear sky.

I came home with a bloated upper lip, unable to feel anything. My entire upper lip and nose were numb. Not wanting to drink or eat with no feeling in my lip, I got straight to making bread. And oh! How I love my new cooking thermometer gun. It’s so incredibly simple and easy to read. I wish I’d got one long, long ago.

I could see a lovely thick foam on the top of my wet ingredients, and that excited me. It told me that I’d get great lift in my dough, and as it rose so beautifully, the house filled with the delicious fragrance of yeast. Oh, how I love that smell! And my new proofing bowl is perfect!

My appointment was at 8:30 yesterday morning, and at 11:30 my nose and lip were still too numb to eat. I drank in front of a mirror until the freezing was gone. But just as the second resting phase of the dough was up and it was time to put the bread in the oven, my lips felt normal. It was 13:00! And once the bread was out of the oven, Her Highness and I went walking at Elder Cedar.

The second rise was less successful. I was disappointed. Previous loaves of the same dough had a billowing round, high, loaves. I probably kneaded it too much, but its taste is fabulous! That’s what I love about baking bread; it’s so forgiving.

Slow night on the chaise. I was not getting any sound on cable. When I was working on the font piece is did something, following directions from Google, and I fucked -up my preferences file. Oh goody. Two tech problem. Oh joy, at Christmas. The baby Jesus is with me. Fuck.

I am one voice in a growing Library of Dysfluent Voices. Conor, the curator of the Library, sent out a call for submissions asking people to create a font inspired by the story we tell orally in the Library. Aidan texted me today to remind me to submit. The call ends on Dec. 15. I have neither Photoshop nor Illustrator software. I can't afford it now that I am not working. So, I made my image in Word.

Coincidentally, I used to draw words in art class in junior high. The teacher's concern was our understanding of perspective, so I drew words, sitting in parks, and looking like a huge, magnificent tributes to language. My love of words is real, my skill with them is variable, especially since retirement.

Today, Kris comes at noon to help me with the call from my doctor. I have written her what I would like her to say to the doctor for me. It’s going to be interesting because his receptionist is the person who hung up on my TTY operator TWICE when I tried to verify the appointment. Plus, I need to know how often he wants me to have blood tests.

Drama, at Pinecone Park. Here are some photos from recent walks in the forest plus one fabulous Christmas image.

I have a particular fondness for Salal leaves. I use them to
make chocolate leaves, and in bouquets. They turn lovely
colours in the Autumn.

Look at that colour!

Sadly, the camera cannot capture the beauty of this leag.
It is a burnished silver colour like aged pewter.

This was a particularly tall shroom.

SPACE Promo; HEAVY Rain

 It was very wet yesterday. It rained all day, so our morning walk was short because it was really raining hard in the morning. After our walk, we went into the village to do some shopping before coming home to wait for my Tezspire to arrive. It arrived while I was Zooming with Dwight, and now it’s in the fridge because I am not taking it until the end of next week. They delivered this dose super early. I guess it’s because of the Christmas holiday.

I wish the scabs on my nose would come off. My nose has been bright red and has two round dark scabs on it from the love bites of Vinny. They embarrass me. But hey, it ain’t cancer. 

I was very happy to have a day of rest yesterday. Tuesday was a nasty day because of the St. Paul’s incident. I was so angry that day, but all my anger dissipated when I got a reply from Dr. Maza. And it was a great reply, which he copied to Mr. Norm Peters, Chief Operating Officer of Providence Health Care who will “review and follow up with [me] directly to identify how best to support [me] and address any future concerns.”

Mid-day, we took our second walk when the rain was gentle. The fog had rolled in though, making it feel very depressing outside, but inside, with the fire on, it was heavenly. And last night, I watched season three of Dalgleish staring the man who doesn’t yet know that he’s in love with me, Bertie Carvel. I love the series, and I love Bertie.

I felt odd all day, so I did nothing but lay around. Still, I slept like a bear last night. This morning, I must walk Her Highness early. I have a dental appointment at 8:30. When I come home, I plan on baking some bread.  

When I got up, I thought I’d weigh myself because it had been a while since I’d done it. Last time, which was a couple of weeks ago, I weighed 171 and I was pleased that my weight was staying at around 170. I psyched myself in advance of stepping on the scales as I always do. I was thinking that I’d put on weight because I’ve been eating more, but I weighted 159.

I thought my scale was broken, so I went back and got on the scale a second time. It hit 159 again, so I’ll be eating more each day. I don’t want to lose any more weight. I can’t recall ever weighing so little. When I decided to address my overeating and addiction to sugar, I weighed 197.

The atmospheric river has dried up. When I went out for wood this morning the moon was bright and almost full. We’ll enjoy our walks this afternoon.

Everyone at SPACE is very excited because of an article Aidan secured in the Vancouver Sun to promote an upcoming SPACE event featuring artists who stutter. Here’s a link to the article.

It’s (mostly) forest day in the photos!

St. Paul's Hospital Lets Me Down

 

Above is a screenshot of the call I made to St. Paul’s yesterday morning.

(See below)

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December 9, 2025

 

Dr. Francis Maza

Vice President, Mission, Ethics & Spirituality

St. Paul’s Hospital 

1081 Burrard Street

 

Dear Dr. Maza,

I am writing as a patient of St. Paul’s and a person who stutters, to communicate an alarming experience I had on the phone with St. Paul’s staff, and to request your support in remedying this issue moving forward.  

Yesterday, I received a voicemail by a woman on behalf of Dr. Hull, asking me to call to arrange for an appointment. Because I am non-verbal over the phone and live on Gabriola Island, I wanted to arrange for a video chat which is what I do when I have an appointment with Dr. Dorscheid, my asthma doctor also based at St. Paul’s.

I use the Telus Referral Service to make my calls, which enables me to communicate with people who call me with the help of an intermediary. I log into the service online, and I get an assistance operator; my operator yesterday was Nicholas. He reads my message that tells him who I want to call and what I want to ask and/or say. He called the number left in the message: 604-806-8832.

As Nicholas was explaining the Referral Service to the person who answered, the person hung up. Nicholas tried a second time, and again, the person hung up. I have a transcript of the call, which I’ve attached to this email.

On your hospital website, you have a page with a section entitled: “Mission-driven, committed to all who live in BC.” Beneath that heading is this sentence: “Putting in place the right people and plans to address equity, diversity and inclusion issues.” In spite of your stated intent at the hospital, your staff failed me yesterday.

I cannot use a phone. However, I can speak well enough to get my thoughts and questions expressed when I use a video chat service, when I can see the person to whom I am talking. As I said above, I use it to communicate with my asthma doctor, but when I managed, with help, to contact the person who left the message on my answering machine on Monday, she said a video chat was not available for me to talk with Dr. Hull. I will, therefore, require a friend here with me when he calls to help me communicate with the doctor.

St. Paul’s should be more accessible to people with speech disabilities to be true to your mission statement. I am a board member of a disability advocacy organization called SPACE that is based in Vancouver. SPACE runs accessibility workshops to agencies and corporations to provide guidance on serving those with communication disabled people. Were you to sensitize your institution to the challenges stutterers and non-verbal people experience with your staff, it would make your mission statement something I could believe in and firmly get behind. SPACE can help you do that. To visit our website go to www.spacetostutter.org.

I look forward to your reply and hope that it includes an invitation to bring a Listening/ Communication Accessibility Workshop to St. Paul’s. 

To arrange for a workshop, contact Aidan Sank at (address removed).

 

Sincerely

Chris Loranger

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As a result of this experience, I suggested to Aidan that SPACE have a “Complaint Department” so people like me who have experiences like I did yesterday, can inform SPACE and we can follow up as we did today with St. Paul’s. This is advocacy in action, calling out places that claim to be accessible, but aren’t.

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Her Highness and I walked twice yesterday, and the rest of the day was spent on fallout from my experience with St. Paul’s. I was blind angry. But the evening was relaxing and cozy. It was just what I needed. I watched Superman. I was trying to capture the joy I felt attending a movie with epic effects and scenery when I was a child. It didn’t work. The movie is stupid, but I could look at David Corenswet and Nicholas Hoult all day every day.