Thursday, June 22, 2017

Bruce's Birthday

Today is Bruce’s birthday. He’s 70.
He’s different like I’m different.
I have no idea what people think about me. My friends have seen seizures, spasticity and really bad speech. There are times when I feel my old self, but I don’t know if they see it. Bruce, I’m sure, knows he’s changed.
The “new” Bruce is much softer and quieter; sometimes it’s like he’s off in his own calm place. Everything is slower. Everything.
Soon he’ll be in a hospital that’s an hour away; it’ll mean a two-hour commute and I cannot imagine, right now, not going every day.
We were acquaintances for many years and then I had a heart attack and he came to visit often and when I came out of hospital we had became close friends. Now another illness is bringing us even closer, I think. I feel so engaged, protective and committed.
Perhaps that’s why I’m talking more easily. I noticed it yesterday and it’s continued today. Maybe it’s karma for visiting Bruce. (I’m kidding.)
Bill, the physio, is kissing me off and I’m quite happy about that. He’s armed me with exercises and I’ll go back in two weeks for a tune up and then I’m done. He really helped and I am glad to lose a weekly trip to VGH.
Next week: No Bill and no Dr. Shoja and, perhaps, ‘the’ decision. Wow. It’s a big week. I’m excited about a week without therapy.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017


Wednesday night I had Bruce to myself. I sat with him while he ate dinner in his new room. There’s not a lot to talk about and for forty minutes, I just sat there while he slept as we waited for the dinner to arrive.
When I arrived for the morning visit, as I entered the room David and Karen both said, “Oh, there he is” because Bruce has just where I was. And tonight, when the nurse needed some time with him alone, when she came out she said; “He wants you in there.”
This is a man whom I often don’t see for weeks although we live close to each other and are close friends. We’re alike; we’re introverts and don’t need a lot of contact — well… didn’t. Now we get together twice a day.
His illness, the contact and human nature have me positively passionate about him. I think we both have discovered how much we mean to each other and we are becoming closer. I could not be happier. I love every minute we’re together — even sitting silently as he sleeps.
Then I come home and my ladies make me wonder if we’ll all go to the Arts Club. But one thing about time of late is that it seems like the weeks fly by. In no time, I will know. But next week I’ll be on pins and needles.

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Patterns / A Busy Week

My pattern this week is:
  • Waste the early morning reading the news and my favourite blogs.
  • Then cleaning me and the condo up.
  • Then to Bruce.
  • Then home and errands.
  • Then to Bruce.
  • Then dinner and chilling out.

This is a guy who normally stays home alone all day.
I’m not getting any work done but come Friday or early next week, Bruce moves to the rehabilitation hospital for an estimated six weeks. Then, I will not visit as often as it is a long way away and I’ll get more project work done.
I had a flash of confidence today. I flash of excitement and optimism that the Arts Club will say yes. It felt really good and then passed.
The smell of the air intoxicates me. Sound kills me and bright light can cut like a razor, but my increased sense of smell delights me.
As the dress project winds down, I’ve need started thinking seriously about what my next project will be. I’m thinking … birds or dinosaurs. I could make dogs; life-size paper dogs would be fun to make, or Luther Burbank’s multi-apple tree (I love the man).
Dr. Shoja this morning and then I saw Bruce, then lunch with Cathy, then home for a break before a return to Bruce and then home to collapse.