David & Lydia Visit

Saturday dawned dark and wet, so I lit a small fire. I wanted the place to be warm and cosy for David and Lydia. But by noon, the day had become sunny and bright. Her Highness and I went for a short walk before going into the village to attend the Farmers’ Market. I wanted to get some plumbs and dog treats for Sheba. Then we came home, and I got busy baking another plumb cake for our dinner. 

The house was full of the smell of a baked plumb tart when they arrived at 2:45. It was a lovely way to welcome them to Pinecone Park. Sheba, of course, provided the 21-bark salute. We all came inside, and they got settled and then we got to chatting over snacks and (non-alcoholic) drinks. It felt wonderful to be back together, and I had enjoyed a long Zoom chat with Steve in the morning, so we had him to discuss as well.

All we did all afternoon was talk and laugh together. I am so, so comfortable with these two dear friends who are a vital part of my legacy of life with Steve. They loved the dinner I made, and so did I. I’d made a great Caesar salad, that I forgot to serve them, pesto pasta with fresh basil from the garden, and for protein and cooked us each 5 huge prawns in a very buttery sauce with dill, shallot, and garlic, and we ate an entire (small) baguette, dipping pieces into the Prawn sauce. And I served my plumb cake for dessert. Then we watched a movie and went to bed. 

Saturday was quite showery, although there were some generous sunny periods, but Sunday dawned bright and sunny (and cool). Lydia and I began our day with a long, long soak in the spa, and then we all went on a long forest walk together. After our walk, we dropped Sheba off at home and we went to the Surf for lunch. It could have been a big mistake.

When we pulled into the parking lot, it was jammed with cars. We arrived at 1:00, got a table by the window, and when we ordered, the server advised us tha there would be an hour wait for the food. Lydia was unhappy about that; she wanted to leave, but Dave and I were willing to wait. So, Lydia went on a hunt and came back to the table with a deck of cards, and we had a ball playing Crazy Eights until our meal arrived at 2:00. We ate enthusiastically and came home to rest from a busy morning.

We’d eaten lunch so late, we weren’t hungry, so I offered them the salad I’d forgotten to serve the night before, and that was perfect for everyone. And we watched Waking Ned Divine, a movie I have long loved, and David and Lydia were laughing all the way through it. Then it was off to bed early because they were up at 5:30 this morning, and they left at 6:00.

It's always sad when guests leave. I will have a chill day today as life returns to normal. I lit a morning fire to heat up the house for the day, and I plan to take it easy all day. 

Lydia & David Day 1

Friday was wet and I was happy to not have to water any garden beds. I did some shopping and I did some prep for my dinner with Lydia and David tonight.

The best thing about yesterday was Henri. He’s my new gardener. He’s an old guy, no teeth, ponytail, lazy eye, but he fills me with enthusiasm and relief because I have faith in him as a gardener and a man. He arrived when he said he would, and he is very straight forward. He’s starting work on Wednesday, and I’m thrilled. 

I planted a lilac, plumb, apple and maple tree in the front yard, and I built a makeshift fence around them to protect them from the deer. They look awful, so Henri is going to build me new ones that will better serve the trees, look nicer, and be all the same in design. My front yard will look much nicer. I believe I’ve found myself a knowledgeable and reliable gardener. Bronwyn was knowledgeable but completely unreliable.

I’m glad it rained so much yesterday. We all had a cosy day inside with a small fire. Sheba and I had a good long walk in the morning, and she hates the rain, so she was content to be indoors all day. But the best thing about the rain is that I don’t have to do any watering while David and Lydia are here.

I went to David and Lydia’s wedding. I barely knew Lydia when she married. My relationship with Steve was just beginning when we met. She, Steve, their mother, Martha, and I were a unit. We loved being together. I felt we were the heartbeat of the family at celebrations.

Martha took me for a walk once. We walked around the Lake near their home, and at one point she stopped. She turned to me, and she had tears rolling down her cheeks, and she said, “I’m so sorry. I wasted two years being cold to you because you were making me see and accept what my son was. I was so wrong to do that. I see that you love him as much as I do.” And she hugged me. From then all, all her cards and letters to me were signed ‘Mom.’

When I became Steve’s partner, I got a whole family. After Steve left, they all came up to have Christmas with me. Martha is dead now, but Lydia and I have an unbreakable bond. Being uncle to her children has been one of my life’s greatest joys. I’m particularly close to Gene. I babysat him often. He was the first baby I got to hold and love. He feels to be part of me.

We’re going to have a great visit together.

Glorious, Welcome Rain 🌧️

When I met Steve, I fell instantly in love with him. Or so I thought. Now, I don’t know what really was going on. But that was in Vancouver on hot and sunny Summer day at English Bay beach. For a year, we saw each other every weekend, mostly in Vancouver, often in Seattle.

During that year, I often wanted to talk with him, so I’d call, but he was never home. He was always out doing something. Every single night, and he is still living like that. I wondered why he was never ever home, because that meant he was almost never alone, and when he was alone, he was thinking about where he was about to go.

I lived almost my whole life alone. When I’m alone, I’m the person I like to be the most. I am content alone. A very big part of me doesn’t want to have anything to do with human beings. But I found love with friends who pull me out of solitude. 

I become a different person when I am with people. From before I was ten years old, to when I was sixty, when I’d lie down in my bed, I’d hate myself for something I did or said. There were times when I would come home, I’d lie down and would not move until I had to pee, and then I’d lie down again. I’d close my eyes and inside I was dying of shame or self-hated over something I’d done or said. It all made me not want to be with people.

But then, I realized something, the smaller the group of people I was with, the better I felt and performed. John was my first true adult friend. I was 22 years old, and in my first year of teaching. We’d been to the same high school together, where we were now teaching, but we’d never spoken together there. We’d get together almost every weekend, until John married. By then I’d discovered the comfort and security of a friendship, and I found many more. 

Now, much to my dismay, these people I love bring out all my symptoms, and sometimes it can be so fucking frustrating, and annoying. But no more. When I’m with strangers, I cannot talk to them; I communicate in writing instead. And that makes my speech, bad as it is, a blessing.

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I have made a garden connection. It’s like a first date, arranging for him to come by. Henri is coming this afternoon at 4:00. I have a list of things I want done that I’ll share with him, and he can look around my yard at the gardens. We’ll be sussing each other out; I hope for the best.

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Dianne and I made a plan yesterday for our Thanksgiving dinner together here, with Jane and Dana. Thanksgiving with Dianne has become a tradition, and I’m very thankful for this tradition. This will be the first year we share it with Jane and Dana, and I hope that they come every year from now on.

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Rain, wonderful rain, is falling. I lit the fire and am reading recipe’s, hoping to find a plan for a meal for tomorrow night with Lydia and David.

A New Trellis

I felt quite good yesterday. Walking in the forest in the morning with our friends, followed by a long and wonderful conversation with Dwight made me feel great. And doing all the bed linen uplifted me as well. I love climbing into a bed that welcomes me with clean fragrant sheets and pillowcases. Yum!

It stayed cloudy most of the day, but it cleared up in the early afternoon, and mid-afternoon, Pete arrived with his extension ladder, and together we built a trellis and attached it to a huge tree in the garden so that my ever-green Clematis has something to grow on. Pete is a wonderful man. He likes helping me with things and I love his company. What a neighbour!

After an active day, my leg was throbbing and I was back on a cane, but I had such a great sleep in my clean fragrant bed, that today, I am back to full speed on my feet without a cane. And because it was so cool this morning, I lit a fire to warm up the house and I may have another small fire tonight.

It’s a beautiful day today, so I will do some watering, but I will chill for a good part of the day because nothing beats doing nothing for this tired old man.

I took some shots of Pinecone Park this morning, including one of the new trellis Pete installed. Here they are: 

Morning sunlight makes everything look lovely.

I planted Irish Moss around the path I built last
Summer. I planted little plugs of the moss and 
it has just boomed this Sunner.

The two beds under the trees were slow to mature but now they are
making me happy and many are still flowering.

This is the trellis Pete and I put up yesterday.

My magnificent Butterbur.

And speaking of magnificent, I love the evergreen Geraniums that add colour
to my bed of large Ferns.