Application Day!!!!!!!

 Tuesday began with a fright. The power went out and I immediately panicked that I would not be able to inform Dr. Shoja about the problem. But the power returned, and I was very relieved. Until nine, it was dark and overcast, but then the sky cleared, and brilliant sunshine was ours! And that meant that after my session with Dr. Shoja, I will be watering the backyard beds.

I heard from my asthma doctor’s wonderful assistant, Sam. She sent a requisition for me to do a sputum test. I replied that I didn’t think that I’d be able to do it. I failed both times I was asked to do one in the past. So, now I wait to see what she says. It may mean I get a bronchoscopy, and that’s something I could do without, but I believe the point of the testing is to build a case for the administration of the biomed he wants to give me and that is so frightfully expensive.

After replying to Sam, H.H. and I went for our morning walk. I’m glad I waited until the sun was out because our walk was beautifully inspiring. I love our forest walks together very, very much. Every day, there are changes in the forest. On our walk, the best part of the day was the birdsong. It was as if, like me, the birds were thrilled that we were going to have another brilliant day and not a cloudy dark one. (But I do hope for rain.)

My session with Dr. S. was, as always, wonderful. She is amazing and perfect for me. I feel such kinship with her. Once the session was done, I fed the brood and then got to work watering the backyard beds and then doing little tasks around the yard that I wanted to do.

Grayson arrived at about 1:30 and got right to work. He’s broadening the tin roof over the prime woodshed and adding gutters. The work will complete the renovation of the woodshed. It is now a muchmore valuable amenity because what he has done is to expose all the stacked wood to the sun and wind. Now, my green wood will dry quickly.

All three of my Margaret Visser books arrived today. I am so excited to see if reading interesting non-fiction engages me better than was happening with the Mick Herron slow Horses series. Ms. Visser is a terrific writer, but it’s her research skills that make her books irresistible. I’m going to read The Rituals of Dinner first.

With an acute eye and an irrepressible wit, Margaret Visser takes a fascinating look at the way we eat our meals. From the ancient Greeks to modern yuppies, from cannibalism and the taking of the Eucharist to formal dinners and picnics, she thoroughly defines the eating ritual. "Read this book. You'll never look at a table knife the same way again." — The New York Times.

Late in the day, I heard again from Sam. I’ve become so beaten down due to the fighting it took to get the correct diagnosis, so her initiative this morning really raised my spirits. But even better news was to come, in this second email. I’m going back on prednisone for another week, and today, Sam is completing the application for the biomed shot protocol.

It seems odd to me to find myself so powerfully happy I was to hear the news.  I’ve been off the prednisone for a week, and I could feel my breathing getting worse again—only slightly now, but I’m sure it would progress without more intervention. Going back on the miracle drug is very good news. And now there in one last step in the year-long process to treatment: to get the permission.

Just as I was starting to prepare dinner, Pete, lovely, wonderful Pete, was at my back door. He’d come to mow my weed fields. I only let him to the front this time, though. I want to clear the back fields of twigs, cones and dog poop. But what a guy! What a neighbour, he is. And every week, another neighbour with a ride upon mower, mows the median between the road and Pinecone Park.

Now that the sides of my two large woodsheds are open to receive the sun and wind, Grayson extended the roof of them today to increase protection from the rain. In winter, I’ll be putting plywood up against the sides when the rainy season comes.

Today I go to the pharmacy for the prednisone and new inhalers. Sam wants them on my pharmacare record before she submits the application. My medical history with asthma is the basis of the decision.

•

I take an HIV pill every day. Was I to stop, my AIDS would come back. I have three prescription medications for asthma. I’ve had asthma since I was thirteen. I take two prescription heart medications (plus I have a pacemaker). And finally, I have two prescription psychiatric medications. SCIENCE! My church.

Drugs have a bad name. Psychiatric drugs are particularly maligned. I’ve been blown away by the drugs I’ve been given lately. The prednisone was transformative. And so is my Gabapentin. 

A month ago, I asked Dr. Shoja if the cramps I live with might a neurological problem. I was losing sleep because they would come on in the night and then go away and then come back and that would go on for an hour. The pain was terrible. Then I happened to watch the Celine Dion film about her severe cramping, which was described as a neurological disorder, and since I have so many neurological issues, I thought it might be my problem. Dr. S. prescribed Gabapentin, and in the past month I had bad cramps only once, and they were not as severe. Gabapentin, my anti-seizure medication, my asthma and HIV meds. I’d be dead and or miserable without them. How fucking lucky am I, eh?

And now this expensive new biomed Dr. D. is applying for on my behalf. It’ll likely be another miracle. 

I’ll tell you, I’m glad I’m here on Gabe with my pets and neighbours. I’m glad I have a beautiful big garden—that I created—to walk through every evening. And I’m glad for Zoom that keeps me connected to Bruce, Dwight, Steve, Beth, and John and Bunny. I’m glad I live in a mostly silent world, with forest all around me. And thank god for my drugs.

A Fabulous FND Webinar

Monday was terrific. Our morning walk with our friends was an hour and a half in the cool fragrant morning air, taking a new trail that led us through absolutely gorgeous mini-pastures in the forest, and massive towering Maples that are spectacularly beautiful because their leaves shine in a light green in the sunlight whereas all the conifers are so dark.

When we returned home, we both wanted to rest, so I got out my reclining chair and set myself up in the sunshine to chill. Sheba lay on the front sidewalk seeing how many gnarly little things she could get stuck in her fur. And then we had a wonderful surprise: Grayson came by.

He is breathtakingly handsome, and he is so easy and pleasant to talk with. I was chuffed that he noticed all I’d done around the yard. He came by to talk with me about the gutters, and some roofing issues. I’m glad he came by because I was able to show him some screws that I have that come with rubber washers and he was happy to see them because he will use them for the gutters. He's coming back this afternoon to work. I can hardly wait. 

When he left, I got started on watering the edible garden and the beds and trees in the front yard. I love feeding my babies, but it takes forever. My strategy for this year is to water the front one day, and the back the next, and then to have a day of not watering. This is the three-day cycle that I expect to use all summer.

Oh my God, I just looked at the weather forecast, and it thrills me to see that there may be rain over the coming few days. I hope it pours!

At 4:30, I participated in a Zoom session with Dr. Alexander Melinyshyn and Dr. Michael Mack, both of whom are neurologists and are respected experts in FND. What an incredible experience it was! We were 138 people participating, and it was exceptionally well run by Migraine Canada. I get migraines, but not like in my teenage years when I’d lose an entire 24-hour day each week to excruciating pain, and then I’d vomit and after that I’d lose another day having deathly deep sleep.

The presentation was mostly about FND. Dr. Melinyshyn was unbelievably knowledgeable, and he’s prepared himself with awesome slides to accompany his presentation. I was gobsmacked by the session. I’ll be talking about it today with Dr. Shoja who was credited by Dr. Melinyshyn for the reduction in the number and severity of my seizures. 

For Beth: I watched a fun movie called Amsterdam. I watched it on Disney (free, with Shaw/Rogers). It’s a timely watch because it concerns a plot in America following WW1 to install an American general, who was a favourite of veterans, as an unelected president. The climax of the movie is a speech the general gives, and it is word-for-word the text of the real speech given to congress by the real general.

It's a movie rich in humour, style, sets and spectacular acting. Christian Bale is the lead and he’s just incredibly believable as an extraordinary character. And Margot Robbie. It took me a while to get over how beautiful she is so that I could see what a good actor she is. And the movie is full of more famous names: Rami Malek, Zoe Saldana, Chris Rock, Michael Shannon, Mathias Schoenaerts, Mike Myers, Anna Taylor-Joy, and … Taylor Swift. It’s oodles of fun to watch.

Me and Men

 Sunday, My Day, was excellent. I felt no pressure to hurry to walk H.H., I just lazed away the morning until I was ready for the forest. It was dark and gloomy outside; it had rained in the night, and I was happy to not have to water. We had a lovely long walk, meeting neighbours and new people on the trail. Everyone I ran into had a dog.

When we got home, it was time for lunch, and then I fetched my tools and got to work on the second box. I got it done, but it’s a miracle I did. I lost a vital drill bit, and the screwdriver head I use in my drill for screwing got rounded and wouldn’t work. I took a screwdriver apart to remove the heads that are stored inside, and I used one of the heads to complete my job, but the screwdriver is ruined. I have about four of them, so it doesn’t matter.

In the end, all looks good. I’m ready to put up the net, but I am going to wait until the last minute to put the netting up because right now the bees are all over the blossoms and I don’t want to interfere with the bees. The work exhausted me of course, but I am very pleased to be able to make minor improvements to Pinecone Park.

I stopped working at 2:30. I had more to do, but it was My Day and so I had a ‘fuck that’ attitude to more work. Instead, I rested awhile and then H.H. and I went for our afternoon walk. I chose to walk a route I haven’t walked in probably five years. It was a trail I used often when I first moved here, but it’s a muddy mess in Winter, so it just fell out of favour with me. But it was a spectacular walk. It had clouded over and was a very comfortable 14°. 

On the trail, I met Dan. I’ve never encountered him before. He’s an ex cop who was raised in the woods in rural Alaska. Then he moved to Barkerville in northern BC. You should have seen his bike. It’s his ‘bush bike,’ and my God what a machine. There are containers everywhere, bells for bears and cougars, and he’s licensed to carry weapons, but I didn’t see any. He was very chatty. He loves Gabriola, he’s fit as steel, and as we parted, he was extremely complimentary. This has happened to me before: Macho men finding something in me that they like.

One of the most wonderful experiences of my life was meeting a pilot from Arkansas who approached me thinking I was an elite athlete. Can you believe that? But I do have large calf muscles from all the walking I’ve done all my life, and I was wearing Hoka shoes before anyone had heard of them. Athletes love ‘em, and so did my podiatrist. Anyway, we walked the seawall together, chatting the entire time, and when it came time to go our separate ways, he shook hands with me with both hands, and then he put his hands on my shoulders and, like Dan, was extremely complimentary. He said he would never forget out time together; I haven’t either.

And then there was Rick. When I worked for Opus, Rick worked for a man called André, and André was Opus’ computer consultant. Every once in a while, I’d see Rick in the building, and we’d have the briefest of polite exchanges. He was someone outside my radar, but one evening, I got a telephone call from him. His girlfriend, of many, many years, had dumped him—he was in his late twenties. Hurting deeply, he called me, a total stranger, for consolation, and we became very close for several years. He once said, in one of our long conversations about heartache, that he loved me.

I’m very empathetic. I can be crippled by the pain of others, and I think people can sense it in me, and when they do, they will often open right up. That happened with Dan on the trial. We talked for quite a while; he wants to see me again.

•

I’m trying to get some weight of H.H. The month she spent not walking due to her bad feet saw her put on weight and then came the prednisone that had her eating anything and everything she could. I had to always watch her when we were walking to keep her from feasting on Deer droppings. (And to think I so value sleeping with a shit eater!)

Late in the day, I was outside with the hose putting water into the fountain, and I saw some moss in the hole where the water comes out the top, so I pulled on it and out came a long, long thick plug of moss, and now the fountain is circulating water much more quickly, and the hummingbirds are back bathing where the water now tumbles out much more easily. 

Some photos of Pinecone Park:

I don't know what this plant is, but its leaves are extremely
high gloss purple, and over the summer they will turn green

My first Lilac blooms ever.

More Lilac. I could not be happier. My nose is
in heaven every day.

I planted Lily of the Valley in several places in
the yard.. There's something so lovely about them.

Daphne. This is one of my favourite plants. The fragrance is
absolutely heavenly

The Mock Orange is right beside the spa and all this week and
next as I soak in the tub, I inhale its magnificent scent.

The Butter Burr is enormous.

These are the two beds I'm going to net. You can see the posts
I built onto the planters.

Rhubarb blooming!

The huge Deer barrier that was far, far too visible and took up
way too much space is gone. Now I have a discreet fence that
can't be seen from the road. I'm chuffed by the improvement.

MyDwarf Lilac is about to explode with blooms.

A Very Good Day

I loved Saturday! In the early morning, it was spitting and dark, so I lit the fire and it always makes me feel good on such a day to be warm. At ten o’clock, I walked with Her Highness in the forest and when we came home, I got my tools out ready to begin working. Then the sun came out, so change in plan. I got H.H. into the car, and we drove to Silva Bay where I wanted to have lunch because it was the Firetruck’s first day of operation.

The Firetruck is an old fire truck that’s been converted into a food truck by the Hooton’s, the family that runs our best restaurant, Woodfire. I had fish tacos and l was the only one there. The truck is in a park setting by the sea, and there are several picnic tables with umbrellas scattered all around the park. I just love the place when the truck is there. It was exciting for me because my life is so, so dull.

When I got back, I started work on the bird netting over the Blueberries, but my drill/screwdriver quickly ran out of energy, and I had to plug in the battery to recharge it and that took an awfully long time. However, I have made great progress with one of the two beds requiring netting. All the support poles are up and securely fastened to the planter box. All I need to do is add the netting, but I won’t do that until the berries are formed and starting to colour.

I finished up the first box as the clouds thickened. It was time to rest, and so I came inside to chill, proud of my achievement. I am not a natural with tools like drills and saws. After a brief period of recovery, H.H. and I went for our afternoon walk., and when I got back, I got into the spa. Oh, the heat. All my tension disburses in the spa.

Sheba had a good day too. It was her first day on just 5 mgs of prednisone. We’ve slowly reduced her dosage from 50 mgs a day to five, and she’s still showing no signs of trouble with her feet.

Today dawned dark and dreary, but at noon it cleared and I am going out to build the supports for bird netting on my second Blueberry bed.

The magnificent Shoebill.