Tuesday, January 28, 2020

CBT & Akhnaten

I went back to Cathy today. I told her right away, that I’d spent four days hating her and her word, “indulgence.” 
“I used it on purpose,” she said, and I knew that.
We had a great session and I left with a far, far clearer understanding of what cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is and how I it can help me. So tomorrow I will cancel my appointment with Dr. Shoja in Vancouver and apply myself to my CBT homework.
I’m very optimistic about my future. I believe CBT can help me and I also finally truly don’t give a damn any more about my problems with anxiety. I’m speaking very well with anyone I meet on dog walks or at dog play in the parks and I’m able to read aloud for the first time in years, so I can proof my writing better.
Also, the emerging flowers and shoots of flowers-to-be give me strength and a view of a future I want to experience. All feels very, very good.
I came on a fabulous this fabulous little film about Akhnaten on YouTube. I’d sell my soul to see this opera. What I love about the film is its revelation of the charms of the counter tenor who plays Akhnaten:  Anthony Roth Costanzo. (I did not know that at the opening of the opera, he has to walk down a set of stairs, facing the entire Metropolitan Opera audience, stark naked!)
The film reveals details of the amazing costumes and how juggling becomes part of the stage design. And I valued the brief glimpse into the role of the prompter. What a masterpiece of performance this opera is!
Benjamin Netanyahu, indicted for fraud by his own country met with impeached President, Donald Trump to discuss a peace plan for the Middle East. What a fucking disaster of a world we have with leaders like these two criminals. Coronavirus can be defeated but the rot of human corruption seems impossible to stop. 

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