Monday’s dog walk was informative. My friends are Facebookers whereas I am not, so they tell me what they learn about our island on the Gabriola community page. For one thing, I was wrong about my anticipated vaccination. It is going to be more like April/May before I get my shot. It won’t be in the next few weeks it seems. Their other news was that the Silva Bay resort will start reconstruction in May. The original lodge and marina burned down the year before I moved here. This is welcome news as it will mean we have a new restaurant on the island. Such excitement!
Tuesday, a gorgeous day, began with an early walk with Her Highness, followed by a Zoom appointment with Dr. Shoja at nine.
I had done my (self-imposed) homework. I had a bunch of things written down to read to her—including what I hoped would be the major topic of the day: ways to improve my interpersonal skills. She seemed to say, in my February appointment, that she might be able to teach me techniques to lessen the chances of seizing when talking with friends. It was on my written list of topics, but we spent so much time on the other things, we put off that discussion until next time.
Here’s the problem: I can speak fluently to people (strangers) with their dogs in Rollo Park or on the trails. I can’t speak at all to (strangers such as) clerks, receptionists, servers, etc. With trusted friends in person such as my fellows in the small dog walking group with whom I’ve been spending three hours a week for well over two years, I’m fluent from the get-go and I don’t seize.
With dear, trusted friends from my past who live in Vancouver and whom I see or talk via Facetime, I’m terribly disfluent for the first fifteen-twenty minutes and then I have decent—not perfect—fluency. But I’m also very prone to seizing in their company. The more I care about my friends (whom I don’t see regularly), the more likely it is I’ll seize in their company. (I had two seizures speaking with Dr. Shoja yesterday.)
It’s my conversations with friends that we’re trying to fix.
I came home from the dentist to get Sheba, then we went to the post office, to the nursery (for soil) and for a walk together. Then I came home to rest! Talking with Dr. Shoja, having two seizures and going to the dentist wore me out. I lay down and stayed indoors until late in the afternoon when we went to Rollo Park.
It was beautiful in the park. But I cried a lot as I walked. Something was wrong or sad inside.
Today’s begun with a clear starry sky, but it’s supposed to change later and cloud over and we may have showers! If I get some energy together, I’ll plant my ginger, move my cold frame and maybe mow the back lawns.